Neighbor keeps stealing things from my yard. What should I do?

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My neighbor has started stealing things from my yard. The woman moved in around 8 months ago with her boyfriend and son but recently some other family members moved in. Her nephew asked if he could climb the fence to my yard because he chopped down a big weed that was growing from their yard into my yard. I said it was fine, but apparently he thought that meant he could "borrow" whatever he wanted in my yard. I have a patio table with chairs and a bbq grill and I keep my bike out there in the summer. The other night i walked out the door and she's standing their holding my chair. She says to me "Oh hey, we borrowed your chair, hope u don't mind". She borrowed my chair by jumping over the fence and taking it? No, don't think so. I took it from her and said, "is there anything else you 'borrowed'?" The nephew, who is the one who stole it said no. Today, i went out to get my bike and it was gone.
I knocked on the door and said. "Where's my bike? You "borrowed" my chair, your boyfriend asked me if I wanted to sell the bike, and now it's gone". of course I got a whole spiel how they didn't have it, she doesn't ride bikes, her boyfriend was crippled and couldn't ride a bike. I just told her she was an "F"ing liar.
Next thing I know I get a knock on my door and it's the other women who lives in the house, holding the bike. "is this your bike? It was in the alley, I don't know how it got there." My first reaction is not to call the police but feel that I should address this in some way. I'm thinking of telling her if it happens again i will call the police. My question is; am i being stupid? should I call the cops now? I have to live next to these people, and i don't want to be harassed. You hear horrible neighbor stories and I can't really deal with that right now.

Big Rog's picture

Your problem lies in their lack of fear. I'm transcribing some advice from my brother, who has a broken hand, from a "hunting accident." He has some tips from the big house. [He was in juvy once for stealing radios. He's an idiot.]
1- Identify their leader and knock them out. It is best to do this in one punch, but if it takes more than one, that is okay, especially if the other members of the home see it, and at least one of them cries. To make sure one of them cries, you can push one of them down and call them something racist.
2- Steal something from their yard, and put it in your own yard, in a place where they can see it. It is best to make sure it is visibly broken.
3- If you have a handgun, and clean it in your yard so they can see you doing it. If necessary, borrow a handgun.
4- Play loud violent music. It is best to do this while performing step #3. This is one case where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. Cleaning a gun? No big deal. Listening to Slayer? No big deal. Cleaning a gun while listening to Slayer? They will stay away.
Good luck.

twitter.com/bigbigrogrog

george's picture

I fully support Big Rog AND his comments, but in all seriousness why on Earth would you wonder if you're "being stupid??" Your neighbors sound like total scumbag losers and OF COURSE you should call the police on these thieving cretins. Light disinfects, you know.

Good luck!

iahemingway's picture

Ha! Big Rod, I'm 5'4, 50 yr old woman. I don't think i can take the 6ft 20 yr. old guy who did it, but love the slayer/gun idea. I'm going to put up visible barbed wire. I'll confront the woman who pays the rent. I know her landlord and have his number. I just don't want them to take things farther like slash my tires or do things to my house so I'd rather just give her a warning. Just say:

listen, we are neighbors this shouldn't be happening. I'm easy to get along with if you play fair. Next time I won't put up with this. I've lived on this street for 7 years and I know eveyone on this street we stick by each other. I will call your landlord and the police if it happens again.

That's my plan.

Kenzo's picture

Big Rog wrote:
3- If you have a handgun, and clean it in your yard so they can see you doing it. If necessary, borrow a handgun.
Good luck.

Also hanging a Dixie flag outside your house (if you're black it will be even more intimidating).

The way you fight cray cray is to be 100x more cray cray. Some say you can't out cray cray someone who's cray cray but I don't think that's true.

Also if you have a crap car that barely runs, go park it in front of their house and leave it there for months.

On the advice of someone who probably queened-out, this signature has been deleted.

iahemingway's picture

should i put it on cinderblocks?? I just went over there and told them I was going to call the cops and i knew the landlord. I said i knew it was the nephew. The woman who i was talking to just burst out crying and said it was her son and he also stole a bunch of stuff from her. I told her she was an enabler even letting him in the house. I said if i even see him walking down the street i was going to call the cops. He actually called when I was there and told them he was going to find somewhere else to live. If he comes back I will say all this stuff to him.

Kenzo's picture

Electric fence kit:
http://www.powerwizardinc.com/kits.html

You can connect the contacts to anything metal, so long as the object doesn't have metal contact with the ground. To prevent that you need to get a rubber mat or plastic tray and put whatever it is you want to electrify on that. So if you want to keep your bike off-limits, put the bike on a rubber mat and then put a wire cage over it, then gator-clip the leads from the cattle fence kit to the metal cage. Be sure to keep the energizer in a weather-proof spot and the power line to the energizer secure.

If someone decides to touch the thing when it's hot, they'll get the ride of their life. Probably will be the last time they ever climb your walls to enter your yard.

If you're faint-of-heart at doing that, then I would at least put up a camera in the back yard. Got a back window that faces the yard? Put a cam in the windowsill and point it to cover the yard.

On the advice of someone who probably queened-out, this signature has been deleted.

Kenzo's picture

iahemingway wrote:
should i put it on cinderblocks?? I just went over there and told them I was going to call the cops and i knew the landlord. I said i knew it was the nephew. The woman who i was talking to just burst out crying and said it was her son and he also stole a bunch of stuff from her. I told her she was an enabler even letting him in the house. I said if i even see him walking down the street i was going to call the cops. He actually called when I was there and told them he was going to find somewhere else to live. If he comes back I will say all this stuff to him.

If it's a serious enough problem, tell her if it happens again you'll blast the address of the house all over the place for the whole river wards to see. And when it does happen, post the address of the house here.

On the advice of someone who probably queened-out, this signature has been deleted.